It’s healthy to be out of one’s comfort zone from time to time, to keep the brain engaged and to build new skills.
Every day growing up, I would read the bumper sticker words, “Girls can do anything”, which was stuck to the family refrigerator by my feminist father. Yes, we can do anything, if circumstances allow, but sometimes us girls have to make the circumstances and take the initiative.
Take driving ‘Delvy’, for example. It’s a five tonne, eight metre-long Toyota Coaster converted motorhome: a heavy vehicle that requires more than a standard car licence to drive in most Australian states and territories. Both my husband and I have HR licences, but guess who does most of the driving? Yep, he does. Not because he’s Captain Araldite – he often asks if I want to drive, and I know I can always jump in the driver’s seat – but I prefer to take the easy option and stare out the big windows. I navigate and decide where we will camp for the night, but Google Maps and other relevant books and apps have made that job easier now, provided I pay attention. You see, we tend to step into the usual gender roles – he drives, she cooks (unless it is on the barbecue), he changes the oil filter, she does the grocery shopping, he’s worked hard all day, she cleans (even though she’s worked hard all day too). Why? Because it’s easy, and most of us have been conditioned to perform particular tasks.
Parked in the town of Meningie, SA
So, when hubby goes away for work it’s time for me to step up, because I have to. And that’s a good thing. It’s been seven years since I drove Delvy solo across the country, and since that time I have hardly touched the wheel. There’s nothing stopping me; I have a HR licence so I should use it. Actually, it was me who influenced my husband to get his HR licence too, as I had always wanted to learn how to drive a heavy vehicle.
It’s healthy to be out of one’s comfort zone from time to time, to keep the brain engaged and to build new skills: or at least not lose the skills one already has. As we get older, it’s easy to fall into the comfortable shoe mode of thinking and just do what we know how and avoid anything different or challenging. Maybe it’s a middle age thing. Whatever has led me down this path of indifference, it’s time for a change. I’m putting a rock in my shoe, purposefully.
I was nervous to start with, but after a couple of days I soon got used to driving Delvy again. Like anything, you get better with practice. It helped that I was very familiar with Queensland’s Bruce Highway, having motored up and down it multiple times, and the wide open flat road makes it less daunting.
Exploring Howard, Qld, on two wheels instead of four
I have learned to not overwhelm myself. I park on the edge of town or in large areas. Then I jump on the bike to explore further, or sling on a day pack and use my legs to get around. I avoid cities and do research of where to park before tackling busy areas. Before visiting friends and family, it’s prudent to enquire about accessibility of their driveway or if there is appropriate off-street parking. I was caught out when visiting an acquaintance in Adelaide Hills. The actual driveway was okay; it was the approach that was scary, down a very steep hill before turning in. Getting back out did raise the blood pressure somewhat.
My advice, for what it’s worth ladies, is to build confidence by starting off on the open road first. Then progress to travelling through small towns, then higher traffic areas. Don’t forget to practice reversing too. I think it’s important to be able to drive our motorhome, or if we ever tow anything. I used to reverse our little speedboat down the boat ramp as my husband is much better at giving hand signals than I am. Doesn’t that sound familiar? Each person needs to know how to drive their vehicle, and be comfortable doing so in case anything happens. But more than that, it’s empowering. You’re playing an active role in the adventure and not just coming along for the ride. It can also be amusing to swap back-seat-driving roles too.
Made it all the way to the Tropic of Capricorn
When my husband returns from work, we’ll have to rock, paper, scissors for the driver’s chair as I am enjoying my reinvigorated confidence after 1050 kilometres of solo driving. I’ll be doing oil changes next. I wonder what will be for dinner?
